The Proof is in the Presence

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  Have you ever made some changes in your life only to realize that you weren't really making any progress? Perhaps you spent hours studying for a upcoming test only to realize that it was an open book test. Perhaps you started to exercise more and yet make no progress because you failed to change your diet. There are times we can make a lot of changes but fail to see any real change.

    This is exactly what was happening to the Christians in Colossae. They were making "amazing" changes—dressing differently, acting differently, and following strict rules about what to eat or drink . 

    The problem? These were changes God never demanded. They were acting out of obligation and fear to gain God’s favor, rather than out of a genuine relationship. It did not matter how many changes that they made, they were not getting any closer to God. 

    Paul’s message to them is a wake-up call for us: Christianity isn't a list of external regulations; it’s about a relationship with the person of Jesus that naturally transforms us from the inside out .

"Therefore put to death your members which are on the earth: fornication, uncleanness, passion, evil desire, and covetousness, which is idolatry... But now you yourselves are to put off all these: anger, wrath, malice, blasphemy, filthy language out of your mouth... Therefore, as the elect of God, holy and beloved, put on tender mercies, kindness, humility, meekness, longsuffering; bearing with one another, and forgiving one another..."- Colossians 3:5–13 (NKJV)

Changes That Reflect the Relationship

    Lets face it, the company we keep, no matter what we might think has an impact on us. When you spend enough time with someone, you can't help but be changed by them. Paul explains that our relationship with Jesus should produce three specific shifts in our lives.

1. Putting Off the Old Self

Just as a married person stops making purely independent decisions or spending money without a thought for their spouse (or at least the should if they don't want to sleep in the dog house all the time), our relationship with Jesus requires us to "put off" behaviors that don't reflect His character .

  • This includes "mortifying" or destroying sinful attitudes like greed, anger, and gossip. These aren't just "bad habits"; they are things that no longer fit who we are in Christ.

  • Several years ago there was a movement that really caught on with young Christians. They would were these bracelets with W.W.J.D embordered on it. The acronym W.W. J.D. meant "What Would Jesus Do". It was a gentile reminder for them to think about what Jesus might do in a given situation. That attitude should not just be something that is embordered on a bracelet, but really should be how we live our lives each and ever day. Would Jesus say the things we say? Would Jesus have the same attitudes toward others as we have? If the answer is no, than maybe we should not do those things either. 

2. Putting On the Character of Christ

    Paul doesn't just tell us what to stop; he tells us what to start. Because of our relationship, we should "put on" things like compassion, kindness, and patience. 

  • The "Emotional Contagion" Factor: In psychology, there is a phenomenon where spouses begin to reflect each other's emotions and character purely because of the time they spend together. This year me and Lydia will have been married for 24 years this June (2026). I can tell you that because of the amount of time we have spent with each other it has changed us both. I can tell when my wife is upset or depressed, or happy and my wife can do the same for me. 

  • The Spiritual Parallel: The more time you spend walking with Jesus, the more you will unconsciously begin to emulate His character. The longer we spend with the Lord and drawing closer to Him the more His life will be reflected in the life we live. 

3. Finding a New Identity

    In Christ, old labels like "Jew or Greek" or "slave or free" lose their power because "Christ is all and in all".

  • When a couple marries, they often share a name, a home, the same bills, in short they become united together. The couple in a real way begin a new identity as a couple. 

  • In a study on long-term relationships, researchers found that couples who had been married for over 25 years showed significant "neural overlap," meaning their brain activity became remarkably similar when thinking about themselves versus their spouse. 

  • This mirrors the spiritual reality Paul describes: the longer we "walk in Him," the more our identity merges with His. When we are saved, we are no longer identified by our past sins or mistakes. We are now identified as the "redeemed, loved, and forgiven" children of God. 

Closing Thoughts

    If you are trying to change your life through sheer willpower or to satisfy a list of rules, you will eventually burn out. You can only do so much and you can only do it for so long. True and long lasting  transformation is a result of proximity not your will power. As you spend time with Jesus, your behavior, your speech, and your very disposition will begin to change—not because you're forced to, but because His life is flowing through yours. Its not a overnight transformation, but rather a life long transformation that beings when you surrender our life to His.

Think back to that initial question: Are the changes you're making today "the right ones"? Are they aimed at checking a box, or are they a natural reflection of the time you've spent with the Savior? Don't focus so much on the changes you need to make but rather focus on your relationship with Jesus Christ. Over time He will begin to make the needed changes in your life. 

Location: Ashmore, IL 61912, USA

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