Covenant Over Convenience: Recognizing Marriage as Serious Business

 

   Are we treating our marriage vows as a sacred covenant before God, or merely as a consumer contract? Do we see wedding ceremony as just a union between a man and a woman, or is it something more? When we think about marriage what part does God have in the equation? 

    In a world driven by convenience, contracts are broken the moment one party fails to deliver on their end of the bargain. But God never intended for marriage to operate on a consumer mindset, yet this seems to be the mentality that many people have today. 

    We often treat weddings like they are nothing more than a bride's special day, a sweet ceremony, or a lavish party. We spend so much time making sure the decorations are put in place, and the venue scheduled. We send out invitations and make all the arrangements that need to be made, to ensure this day is special. We spend so much time considering the service, and yet spend so little time on the commitment that we are actually making. We spend so much time making sure that our family and friends are in attendance, and yet so little time considering the vows we are making before God.

    This casual view of marriage has contributed heavily to a culture where 50% of relationships dissolve when the feelings change. The enemy of our souls works tirelessly to trivialize marriage because he knows that if he can destroy the covenant, he can destroy the family. For the past several decades we have minimalized marriage and have sought to redefine it.

    Yet Jesus spoke firmly on the subject. His teachings were so sharp and counter-cultural that even His own disciples gasped and muttered that if the standard was that high, "it is better not to marry!".

Let's look at the weight of Jesus' words in 

And I say to you: whoever divorces his wife, except for sexual immorality, and marries another, commits adultery.” The disciples said to him, “If such is the case of a man with his wife, it is better not to marry.”- (Mat 19:9-10)

He answered, “Have you not read that he who created them from the beginning made them male and female, and said, ‘Therefore a man shall leave his father and his mother and hold fast to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh’? So they are no longer two but one flesh. What therefore God has joined together, let not man separate.”

(Mat 19:4-6)

"Yet you say, 'For what reason?' Because the Lord has been witness between you and the wife of your youth, with whom you have dealt treacherously; yet she is your companion and your wife by covenant." Malachi 2:14 (NKJV) 

    Jesus' core target in this text isn't actually the act of divorce itself; He is emphasizing that marriage is incredibly serious business. He warns that because our oaths still stand in the eyes of God, entering into a remarriage flippantly—without biblical grounds like unrepentant adultery—amounts to committing adultery. That was a hard pill to swallow back then just as it is today! 

    You see Jesus raises the bar of marriage to remind us that the vows we make to one another is a solemn oath made before a holy God. It is a covenant relationship entered into by one sinner and another sinner. Crucially, your vow means that you promise to remain committed before God, regardless of whether the other person perfectly upholds their end of the deal. That is something people need to think about before they say "I DO"!  Even if a spouse chooses to walk away and break their oath, it does not automatically give you a license to discard your integrity or break yours, does it? While Scripture tells us that it is  better to marry than to burn with desire, Jesus' ultimate point is that entering a marriage—and especially a remarriage—must never be done lightly or without deep prayer, time, and counsel. God takes our vows seriously and so should we!

Bringing the Blueprint Home

    Think of it like signing a lifelong, unbreakable treaty between two nations. You don't sign a treaty based on how sunny the weather is on the day of the ceremony; you sign it knowing that storms, winters, and hardships will come, yet the treaty must stand.

So how do we apply this today based on our relationship status?

• If you are single: Take your time. Do not rush into a relationship out of loneliness. Don't rush down the alter unsure that you will be able to fulfill your vow to your partner. Don't start planning a wedding ceremony if you have not done the work of preparing for your marriage. Seek a godly man or woman, pray aggressively for wisdom, and listen closely to the counsel of those who love you.

• If you are married or you are remarried: Strengthen your resolve. Recognize that the Devil is doing his dead level best to destroy your family and ruin your marriage. This means you have to work harder than him to make your relationship stronger. Double down on your commitment, put Christ at the dead center of your home, and seek His strength as a couple. Pray and ask God to make you the husband/wife you need to be for your spouse. Guard you heart and prevent the devil to get a foothold in your life and relationship. 

    Let's circle back to where we began: Are we treating our vows as a covenant or a contract? If we want relationships that endure, they must be treated as the serious, sacred business that they are. We must not make light of what God takes seriously. Take time to ponder this today: What steps can you take right now to upgrade your commitment from simple convenience to a rock-solid covenant? Let us choose to do relationships God's way, matching the enemy's attacks with a fierce, Christ-centered resolve.